es or find
received packets in the right place depending on the answer.

Cleaning up dead connections actually becomes simpler, because we do
not have to do the "last WQE reached" dance that is required to
destroy QPs attached to an SRQ.  We just move the QP to the error
state and wait for all pending receives to be flushed.

Signed-off-by: Pradeep Satyanarayana <pradeeps@linux.vnet.ibm.com>

[ Completely rewritten and split up, based on Pradeep's work.  Several
  bugs fixed and no doubt several bugs introduced.  - Roland ]

Signed-off-by: Roland Dreier <rolandd@cisco.com>
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